Showing posts with label butt hole. Show all posts
Showing posts with label butt hole. Show all posts

Friday, July 1, 2011

your pussy smells like dead fish. wait, i feel something...

have you ever shoved your fingers inside someone...and thought
HOLD UP.
what the heck is that...
of course you have not..because there are only a few people in the world that would
[1] forget to take out a tampon


[2] would put vaseline on their penis so that the condom would slip off inside someones pussy or butt hole. i mean.. PUSSY or MUSSY. ;) ..man pussy. so cute.

just the combination ..really. just like the word. 

[3] i really think that would be it...besides gerbils...but those would be eating through your anal cavity real quick...and you probably would be dead with a rotting gerbil trying to dig its way out of your fetish body


which leads me to think..i wonder if a gerbil in the butt hole would feel like someone tickling your back.
but in your butt hole.
maybe that would be pleasant...

[4] forget they put a tampon in ...and a week later treat themselves for an itchy crotch pussy yeast infection
which..i mean..probably at this point.. would look like a yeast infection because the cotton tampon disintegrated or was chewed up by teeth...
everyone knows a vagina has teeth.

just like a penis has one eye.

both scary things to the opposite genders/sex.
that is why there are homosexuals.
one eyed monsters..and teeth. stick to what we know ;)

anywayss.
end of story..
just kidding.
end of story will end like this.
yes..i slid my fingers inside some pussy.
was like.. "what the heck is this"
but my face portrayed more of a questionable.happy.concerned look.
"i am going to just...do not be alarmed okay..i think there is something inside your vagina and i am just going to scoop it out"
not my fault i can be so casual.
and as i scooped it out..
literally..i went back in twice...
as the smell leaked out of the vagina..each second...my fingers cupped what felt like a hard brick.
and every millimeter it moved...allowed my nostrils to have a sense of encouragement.
you are not broken. CONGRATULATIONS!
a rotting mouse smell . no. let me just say fish for fun. rotten fish..you think walking passed a fish market smells.
picture a fish market where all the fish were dead. and you had to jump in a swimming pool of just dead fish.
now we have the right picture.


"i apologize for this happening..and i am not disgusted ..but this does have an odor to it...so i am going  to go through this away and wash my hand. "
i ..of course..re ensured i was not disgusted.

good morning...week old -- soaken wet...with a film of snot surrounding the entire thing -- tampon ;; whose pieces ..small little pieces..detached themselves from the tampon..and were having a party inside the vagina..around the fishytampongoodness

mainly because i am such a nice person.
but it was disgusting.
good thing i ..love....disgusting.

Monday, June 27, 2011

is that ...BBs...in your crap?

.."reychl..there has been an accident in the restroom across from the gym"

FANTASTIC.

i ..of course...grab my mop bucket...disinfectant...and..never forget the gloves...slap those bad boys on..and we are ready for a cavity search..as i roll this yellow bucket...whose wheel keeps getting stuck to the bathroom...i am like..great..JUST GREAT.
"i am so sorry reychl..."
yep..that is what i hear walking towards the bathroom.....and the person who said it..well well...it could only mean one thing...ONE THING...


yes...thankyou sooo soo much...i could smell your crap before i even unlocked the door..and as i walk in...i hear.. 
"you can come in..it is fine..i mean..he has no pants on..is that okay?..he has a long shirt on though..."
me - " that is alright..just here to clean up some crap that i can smell all the way down the hall"
..just kidding. i did not say that..but i wanted to..because ...
it smelled..soo ..sooo bad ..and as i walked in...and got closer.closer.closer..
i coudl see ..little soft ..what resembled..Beebees...yes...small pellets..all up in the poop.
nice...brown crap...with a hint of yellow/brown pellets...
he probably ate them thinking..wow..this will accent my crap so very nicely as reychl picks it up with her hands.
and as i was scooping up the piles of diarrhea..chunky diarrhea...
i was hoping...my gloves did not have a hole in them. since i forgot to check.

and as i am almost finished...i could not help myself look at this poop closely...what was seriously in it..i would have asked..but unfortunately...the man that pooped on the ground was wearing no pants ..or knickers..and 
well..i could not look at him..and ask that question...
so instead..i looked at it closer...and as the woman went to go get him new clothes...i took a picture of the poop so i could blow it up and send it into ncsi; bathroom edition

i finally finished spraying the floor and wiping up poop that had gotten in between tile..of course..i should have left it there for a little souvie. maybe the ants would have liked a little mudd pie.
he walked over to the stall..where he eventually finished dumping his load...and stepped in the other pile..
THANK YOU SOO SOO SOO VERY MUCH.
now you have crap no the bottom of your foot..which is soo attractive..but now..
now i have to clean up..crap foot prints..ONCE AGAIN.

thank you ..and i appreciate your service. next time..please eat pumpkin seeds whole so i can rinse out your poop and have a snack while cleaning up your insides waste.